No Mistake

"You were a mistake!'
"I wish you'd never been born!"
"Your dad hated you.  He didn't even want to touch you for two years after you were born!"
"Can't you do anything right?"
"Quit hanging on me.  What's wrong with you?"
"You'll never make it in life without someone to help you."
"You're such a failure as a daughter."
"You're ugly."
"What's wrong with you?"

Have you heard any of these words?  Did you grow up thinking you were no one of worth?  As a tiny child, you may have heard the spoken or unspoken message that you were not wanted, were good for nothing and certainly, that you were not accepted or even liked.

Perhaps simple needs of a baby were unmet, because your parent couldn't cope with touch and you were made to feel abnormal for even wanting to be held or loved.  You may also have felt you didn't deserve to be loved.  You may have even been physically, verbally or sexually abused.

Having this kind of upbringing has stunted your life emotionally and you feel worthless.  Well, DO I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU!  God's Word says:

"You made all the delicate inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.  Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!  Your workmanship is marvelous--how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born,  Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed."  Psalm 139:13-16 (New Living Translation)

"I knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb.  Before you were born, I set you apart . . ."
Jeremiah 1:5 (New Living Translation)

Does this sound as though you were unplanned or unwanted?  You may have been by your earthly parents, but you are infinitely important to the God who formed you and planned for you.  He loves you to the uttermost, even death on the cross.  You were definitely no mistake.

Open My Eyes, Lord

Beauty is essential to my well-being.  I don't mean the physical beauty of a human being, but the beauty of colors and nature.  Recently, I began collecting pictures of amazing natural scenes.  It causes a visceral jolt in my body when I see them.  It almost hurts, but in a good way.  Sort of like taking my breath away for a moment.

I feel better after looking at these photos.  When it's dreary outside, I pull up my own nature photography and rejoice in the bright colors and vivid sunsets and sunrises.  In winter, I look at summer flowers and feel a surge of hope that the dreariness won't last forever.

A hike in the forest or at the ocean refreshes me in more ways than physical.  I sense the wind on my face (and often rain).  I smell the fragrance of fir trees or of salt-tanged air.  I see the glory of ancient trees and crashing waves.  The only problem is, I don't live in these situations on a daily basis.

How can I possibly satisfy this craving for the beautiful in life?  I found the answer.  It lies in looking for the lovely, no matter where you are.  If you are busy looking for the lovely, you won't be concentrating on the ugly.  You will sense the fresh breeze, the softness of raindrops on your face, the scarlet leaf lying on brilliant green grass.

All around me, every day, there are small or large things that I take for granted or don't see because I'm not looking.  I make it a practice to take my camera along every time I go for a walk.  I look constantly for some special thing.  The other day, the sun sparkled on grass, making it look like a field of diamonds.  Wow! 

Let me challenge you to look for the beauty in life. Pray the prayer: "Open my eyes, Lord."  It is amazing how it will change your perspective on life.  No detail is too small to bring pleasure and uplifting.  Enjoy the following pictures and perhaps they can give you some incentive to look around and see the beauty.

OVERWHELMED

When something new comes into my life, I find myself easily overwhelmed.  New facts bombard me.  New demands make me constantly readjust my schedule.  I feel ignorant and sometimes, downright stupid!
Yet, a quiet stirring in my soul says, this is good.  You are alive.  You are learning.  You are moving forward.  Each step is a new beginning.  Not knowing about something does not indicate stupidity.  It indicates that you are willing to learn and grow and stretch.
Even though sometimes I am so stretched I feel like a girdle on a hippopotamus and nervous as can be, I am living life.  I am growing (and not just in the physical realm), despite my almost 70 years.  A new career is mine because I am willing to try and learn.  In spite of a debilitating illness and much pain, I am going forward to fulfill the plan God has for my life.  I do it in His strength.
I am blessed and humbled.
Today I attend my first meeting of the Toastmasters.  I'm going to learn to speak with confidence in a public setting.  That is very much out of my comfort zone, but I am excited to see what happens.
Don't let excuses of age, physical condition, low self-confidence hold you back.  Become what God has planned for you to be and you will gain a new excitement for life, just as I have.

Joy in Pain

Weeks of gray, cold, damp weather invades my joints and I hurt.  I am in the middle of a flare of rheumatoid arthritis and am in a great deal of pain in my hands and joints.  I need my hands to write.  Well, basically to do most everything.

The pain reminds me of a time when I cried out to God, asking Him to help me feel again.  My emotions were dead and wrapped in grey, fuzzy wrappers.  A numbness pervaded my being and I wished I didn't need to live this hard life anymore.  During that time, I cried out to God and asked Him to help me feel again.  The pain of my life was so severe, I had gone into emotional shock to protect myself.

I'm so glad He heard my prayer.  I feel alive--in fact, more alive than I ever did when I was young.  I feel excited over life and what God has for me.  I can feel again, and even if some of it is pain, I rejoice, because it means I am still alive and thriving!